For the last 3 years I have been in a relationship with someone who has their Son every weekend.
I am documenting the things that happen to the Son during the Monday to Friday he is with his mother in order to try make sense of what happens. The Dad is too scared to do anything because the Father’s rarely get custody and he knows that if he even tries to get custody, we wouldn’t have the Son ever, and that would be even more of a disaster, one of the other fathers tried and didn’t see his kids for 3 months.
Is it abuse? Is it neglect? What can we do about it? I’m going to document my (Well, his) experiences for the next year and then read back to see what is the best thing to do.
The Son, we’ll call him Bob, is 8 and is still very dependant and devoted to his mother so I think that removing him may be a very wise thing to do.
She, we’ll just refer to her my her job title “Mother”, has 4 children with 3 different partners, the older 3 (12-18 years old) have decided to live with their respective fathers over the last couple of years so it’s just Bob, his mother and her (very absent) partner now.
It’s painful to watch as I have a son of my own, I treat both of them equally and I could never treat Bob the way she does, and he isn’t even my own.
I care for Bob very much and it’s hard because I am powerless to the situation, all I can do is try do counter the damage and hopefully show him what a proper mother should be like.
She has always been careless with her children, in fact, apparently she has gotten better with each child, thus far she’s never beaten Bob. She used to beat the other 3 until they were nearly taken off of her.
The event that started my keeping this log was what happened on 1/02/13
Bob’s Father was collecting Bob. No one was there when he knocked on the door. He called the Mother and she said she was just at a friends and she’ll be back very soon. She turned up an hour later in her car and drunk, fell out of the car she was that drunk. Bob’s dad had to help her stand upright. Bob was in the car also.
She was do intoxicated I could smell the Alcohol on Bob and his dad when they got back home.
A few more things happened in 2013 and 14 but it was always just infrequent enough that I didn’t record it. I really wish I had. But I am now. Too much has happened for me not to.