When is a detective not a detective

When is a detective not a detective

About a year ago, Bob came to ours proud as punch because his mum used to be a detective for the police. She’s retired now but she was so good at her job that they sometimes call our out again on really big and complicated cases.

We knew this was bull but Bob was so chuffed, what can you say?!

Last Sunday She told Bob’s dad that she’s thinking of suing the local council.

This is hilarious…

She was doing a degree in Forensic science (I say she was, she was getting Bob’s dad to do the coursework for her whilst she went to the pub, I’m not even joking! We had no idea how she was managing to progress once he moved out until…) . She got kicked off the course a couple of years for plagiarism.

She’s since been trying to apply for jobs off the back on the incomplete degree. But that doesn’t matter because she has a criminal record.

Long before she met Bob’s Dad, she and a group of friends beat a man half to death and then mugged him. She went to prison, in fact, she gave birth to her first child IN prison.

She’s also committed fraud on several occasions, even against Bob’s Dad as recently as 2 Christmases ago.

The council should have told her that she can’t work for the police force when you have been convicted of an offence that involves violence, stealing of fraud. So she wants to sue them for her wasted time and money.

Because most people need to be told that…?

This confirms that she is not a retired police detective who gets called our for emergencies from time to time (Presumably this is her get out to go to the pub whilst looking like a hero).

Why tell these amazing lies?!

Bob’s brothers had both cottoned on to her and moved out to their father’s by the time they were 11. Bob is 9. It must be heartbreaking to learn that everything your mother tells you is a fabrication. I hope he realises slowly and I hope that we can help him through it.


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